SHELF AWARE BOOK REVIEW
If it is so Good to Talk, Why is it so Hard? by Ian A. Marsh
If it is so Good to Talk, Why is it so Hard? by Ian A. Marsh ‘Talk to them.’ ‘Have the conversation.’ ‘You have to tell them.’
Published by Matador on April 28, 2018
We have probably all been there, whether it was the advice of someone close to us, or our own inner voice.
It is always good advice, but some conversations are hard. We just cannot get the words out. Or we try our best but someone gets angry, or defensive, and it all goes horribly wrong. Maybe we think we got our point across, but it turns out that no-one was listening. Or, perhaps, that was us?
What would life be like if feeling understood – by your family, by your colleagues, by your friends, even by those you strongly disagree with – was a regular experience?
If it is so Good to Talk, Why is it so Hard? brings together the latest neuroscientific research, ancient wisdom and the author’s own experience of helping families through their hardest conversations. It explores why those shutters come down so easily and, through a series of guided reflections, shows us how we can rediscover the power of conversation.
‘Talk to them.’ ‘Have the conversation.’ ‘You have to tell them.’
A very well-crafted and researched read on what communication is so difficult. Ian Marsh makes a great point that we shouldn’t be so surprised that it’s difficult to communicate even within married couples who can normally finish each other’s sentences. There is a great amount of data and research in here. I particularly like the “Reflection” sections and the neuroscience section in Part 2.
However, I found this book a bit difficult to read. It’s written in very stilted language (“cannot’ vs ‘can’t’ and a lack of contractions throughout). I was trying to think of who the target audience of this book would be as it may be a bit tough to work through for your average reader. This would be a great addition to a college course on communication as it does have great information and I could see plenty of times when the information within would be useful. It might be more suited to someone looking for a more academic take on today’s communication issues.
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